A Whole New Seth

Seth's Helmet

Seth first got his helmet from Cranial Technologies on June 6th to correct his plagiocephaly, for more on that see this post. It took a couple days to get used to but then became as normal to him as his own hair. With help from Sign Studios in San Diego, we decorated it with a race car theme.

On August 28th Seth got his second helmet. It was a hard week because we had a heat wave and he had acclimatized to not wearing one while the new helmet was being made. He eventually got used to this one and by the end, was ultra sensitive when we would take it off. We went back to Sign Studios and decorated this second helmet with a dump truck and the label "under construction." Everyone agreed that the second helmet suited him better.

On December 6, after 6 months of being a helmet head, Seth got his helmet off for good. We are SO pleased with the results and don't regret our decision to get the helmets. Seth would have been our cute little guy no matter what, but who would complain about a more symmetrical head shape?

Here are the before and after pictures to give an idea of just how much change has taken place in the past 6 months.
** Sadly, Seth's hair was bunched up on top under the sock but I think you can tell what is hair...

** The point on top is his hair :( I wish they had been able to retake them but we didn't realize until too late.

Cranial Technologies creates a mold of your baby's head so that you can compare the changes weakly. They give you the head molds when your treatment is done... We enjoyed getting lots of pictures with them but since they are extremely heavy and cumbersome and not the kind of decorations I like in my house, we did throw them away after that. The helmets are, however on Seth's bookshelf :)

As you can see, Seth looks MUCH more symmetrical :)


I couldn't do a post without a shout out to Seth's 11 month milestone. He is the best kid in the universe. His laugh has everyone in stitches and he is so loving. He is walking around and says ball, mama and dada (sort of). He loves carrying things around in his hands, eating blueberries and black beans and gives kisses on demand. He is always getting into trouble and tries to climb everything. We love our little guy and can't believe how fast this year is going.

Santa's Village by the Sea

Getting in the Mood

Friday we had Brandon's work holiday party. My friend, Madi, glammed me up and I LOVED my hair. It was fun to get all dressed up and go out to a nice dinner and dancing (or should I say, watching other people dance..) We got pictures taken there but don't have them yet. Madi got some with her phone of my hair and make-up which I was the best part anyway. I got to wear the dress my mom made me over the summer and got several compliments on it, she will be SO happy.

 Yesterday we went to our community holiday celebration event called Santa's Village by the Sea. It is so much fun, they make snow on the hill outside the library and let the kids sled down ($1 per slide, of course!) They have cookie decorating, popcorn, The Polar Express playing and of course, Santa Clause. I am pretty sure I was the most excited one in our group.

Seth is the kid who will go to anybody happily. I can leave him with a stranger and he will have a great time. Lately, he has been on a "I prefer women" kick but he especially likes elderly men so we were thinking pictures with Santa would be an awesome experience, we would have the baby who didn't cry.... well, thats not quite how it went down.

Here is Seth in line for Santa. As the line moved forward, Seth locked himself in place and would NOT move. He was quite hesitant of the Elf. Once she started talking to him, he walked right over to her.

But as we got close to Santa, he would not move again. He even tried to sit down and grab me.

I figured we would just make it fast and he would be happy. I picked him up and put him on Santa's leg. Didn't work.

We did get one moment of peace as he looked into Santa's face... it didn't last long though.

We ended the night by going to this old mission style beach house that was donated to the community. It is like a mini-museum with pictures of San Clemente through the years and lots of newspaper articles. It has a beautiful view of the ocean and pier and it was all decorated for Christmas. There were also carolers and a bell choir (which was not as good as my mother-in-laws but still fun to listen to). Seth and daddy also got some bonding time while they waited for dinner, their favorite activity together is watching top gear. Seth LOVES cars!

Did you notice what's missing in all these pictures?? Seth graduated from his helmet on December 6. He misses it and I kept having him wear it. Brandon threatened to throw it away if I put it on him again so I put it on his book shelf with the other one where it will stay :(. 

My next post will be the before and after pics of the helmet, I can't wait to show off the changes!

10 months

Ten Months

Seth turned 10 months old a few days ago. He is seriously one amazing kid. He amazes us every day. Seth is still a generally happy kid but has become a little bit more clingy to me and instead of letting everything brush off of him, he now gets upset when things don't go his way. 

Seth took his first steps on November 6th and takes more and more each day. He loves our new after dinner activity where Brandon and I sit across from each other and he walks back and forth between us. This usually involves one of us with a toy on our head because he walks better when he is looking up instead of at the ground. This week he has become more confident and will initiate walking distances which only require 2-3 steps when he doesn't want to let go of his toys.

One of Seth's new favorite activities is to hold onto a somewhat flat object in each hand and push them across the floor. He LOVES quesadillas and tomatoes. He jabbers all day long and LOVES to play with his friends.

Seth has not gained any weight since he was 6 months old but is still our little chub.

We are so blessed to have this baby boy in our lives and love him more and more each day.

We kept hearing small noises every once in a while but Seth's camera wasn't working, when we finally went in this is what we found. This kid is too smart and strong for his own good.

Budgeting...

I have a love hate relationship with budgets. More love than hate. But there is a lot of hate.

I am in charge of buying groceries, little things we need like shampoo and laundry detergent. those things add up. I only buy what I need to make meals and try to save as much as possibly but did not have a specific budget to follow. After reviewing our finances last month, we decided I could do better and set a budget for groceries. Last month was the first month and I blew through my monthly allotment in THREE WEEKS, one of which we were not even home for.... I didn't even buy meat that month. Yikes. We decided it would be a trial month.

Today is November 1 and I have planned meals for the whole month. I have split the money up by weeks so that no matter what, I still have money left for the last week. (I think we had spaghetti twice last week and mac and cheese today, from a box!) I am trying really, really, hard to make this work but healthy eating is more important to me than saving the money so in the end, I may need a bigger grocery budget... Wish me luck.

How do you plan your meals and what healthy meals does your family like that are friendly to a small budget?

Equality revised

Since writing my last post, some friends have kindly opened my eyes to some new aspects of the issue.

Since I've become a stay at home mom, I have started writing about things I feel strongly about. One of my favorite parts of reading and writing posts is that I learn something new every time I get involved. I am a firm believer that a person should be allowed to change. For example, I call myself a reader. I bet my older sister would be surprised to hear that because when she lived at home, I was not a reader. Since she went to college I have become a reader, I read all the time and love it. People change and not only do I think its okay, I think its healthy. I have not changed my mind or opinion on the topic of equality between men and women, however I now realize that the issue goes deeper than just women receiving the priesthood.

In my last post, I encouraged the idea that having and caring for children is the female equivalent to the priesthood. Well, what about those who can't have children or are not married or those who have NO inclination toward children. To them I would like to apologize for my narrow minded words. To them I would like to say that I still firmly believe that the Lord has a plan for them and that by no means does the lack of priesthood take away from their worth. I don't have the answer to what their role is, but I can tell them to look to women in the church such as Barbara Thomson who inspired women all over the world despite her lack of husband, children, or the priesthood and to the video included in my last past by Sheri Dew. 

Another issue brought to my attention is the fact that women are not allowed in the priesthood session of conference, what harm could it do? None. It would not do any harm, however, I still don't think women should be there. Men need women to support them in their priesthood roles but its still their role. I think men being able to gather together and see others who are striving just like them to be the best they can is a beautiful picture. To think that those men can look around and see 21,700 other priesthood holders coming together to be edified, encouraged and instructed. I think women attending the priesthood session, this does not mean watching it or reading it later only attending, would be like our husbands coming to a girls night and lets be honest who really wants that? I know that not everyone would agree, but thats my opinion.

To those who struggle with the quality issues, I am sorry. Your struggle is real and I wish you luck in finding your place. I hope one day you can feel important and needed and I hope I can help you in your struggle by sharing my own testimony that there are MANY things you can do to participate in church. Through teaching, loving, and serving you do more than you can possibly imagine. I also hope that priesthood leaders throughout the church can understand your struggle and make those changes to the culture (not the doctrine) that may make you feel more comfortable.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is true and the Prophet loves each and every person on this Earth and he, through Jesus Christ will listen to your humble prayers to find peace.

"Equality"

Lately there has been so much hype about equality and women's rights. I am a strong believer that women are just as important as men. That women deserve education and rights. I believe that women can do things which men would cower even thinking of, but I also KNOW that there are things men can do that I couldn't  even think of doing! We are different, equal but different. I have never wanted to be a boy. I shrink at the prospect of having the role of a Bishop, I can barely handle my own emotions how could I hope to handle anyone else's? I am a strong independent woman who needs my husband in order to survive. I couldn't do it without him.

I get so sad when I see these women activists trying to get what they think is equality. Some of their ideas are great and I think should be implemented, but those have nothing, I repeat: NOTHING to do with the doctrine of the church. They are things such as more women writers, making a bigger deal about recognizing the young women in excellence award. Those are great ideas, implement them. Write a book. But don't protest in church. Please.

I once heard a quote which I have adopted as our family motto it goes like this: "Fair means everyone gets what he or she needs." Brandon gets 3 pancakes because thats how many he needs to get full. I only get 1. It is not equal but it is fair. The same goes for roles within the church. Brandon gets the priesthood because that is something that our Heavenly father has told us will make him, and other men, better people. They need the priesthood to enrich their souls and better themselves. Women are asked, if possible, to have and raise children. It is what we need to become better and our natures are suited to doing it.

When it comes to many things, my sisters and I are EXTREMELY different but as I get older I have found that when it matters, we have pretty similar views. Luckily for me, my sisters are amazing writers and can put into words what I can only feel. Hopefully she doesn't mind me sharing this  post she wrote about "equality" but It touched my heart and I'm grateful for her example in my life.

"I’m a “bury my head in the sand” type of girl.

If I follow politics/government/global warming, etc – I focus on it and make myself sick with worry and “what ifs”.

I can’t healthily be informed, or I go crazy.

So sometimes, I stay ignorant on purpose. I know the whole world can’t do that, and I’m grateful for the people who get involved and make real changes happen. But I can’t do it and stay sane. I worry myself into despair and illness.

When I was really little, I’d go to bed at night and I would be so afraid. Afraid of the world. Afraid of wars and fights and what the world would be like when I was older. It scared me so much I can still feel the fear I felt then.

I’d come out of bed and beg my parents to let me stay up with them, and they’d get mad and we would have this fight every single night, and I’d end up sleeping on their floor. I slept on their floor a lot. I’m sure they thought I was afraid of monsters and the boogy man and the dark, like most kids.

But I was afraid of the world and of the evil I’d already seen, through real life and movies.

I’ve heard a lot being said about the feminist movement going on the LDS world right now, and was definitely aware of the “wear pants to church” movement that happened in December of last year. I wore my girliest dress instead.

I haven’t done a ton of research into all this, because to be honest it kind of makes me sick and I don’t want to get into the hoopla of it all.

But I read an article today on the feminist movement in the LDS religion – and there are tons of groups out there with agendas ranging from better sex education to young LDS girls (that one I can get on board with) to demanding women get the priesthood and “full equality”.

Trevor and I were talking about this the other day, before the Relief Society General Conference address last week. Wondering if anyone would address all that’s going on with demanding “equality” in the LDS Church.

The whole conference was amazing. And then the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Thomas S. Monson, got up, and I felt the spirit encompass me in a way I haven’t felt often while simply watching a conference address. Sitting there in my local chapel, I felt overwhelmingly that this was the prophet of God, and that what he was going to tell me was true. He hadn’t even begun speaking yet – it was as soon as he stood, that the spirit touched me.

I talked to a friend about this, and she was actually there in the conference center for the session. She said as soon as President Monson stood up, the whole congregation just went silent and the same spirit flooded them as it did me and all the women gathered there in the small chapel in Cottonwood Heights.

Instead of taking the stance of “reprimanding” or however else the topic could have been addressed, President Monson just told us how amazing we are, as women.  How needed we are, and how much good we do.  The good we do is different in Relief Society as the good men do in Elders Quorum. One isn’t better than the other – just different.

As Trevor and I were talking about this, women wanting the Priesthood and believing that was equality, we jokingly started an argument.

I demanded the priesthood!

He demanded to have a baby (as in, pregnancy, carry, deliver)!

I WANTED THE PRIESTHOOD!

HE WANTS TO HAVE A BABY!!!

We both yelled what we wanted and “argued” and laughed.

I don’t really want the priesthood.

He doesn’t really want to have a baby.

His role is to be the priesthood holder in our home.

My role is to conceive, carry and give birth to babies.

Neither one of these is better than the other. They are both important. They will demand different actions and priorities from us. We will both do much good in our families and in the world.

He can’t fulfill his role without me, I can’t without him.

We’re equal. We are different, but equal.

When I was about 8, the then Prophet, Gordon B. Hinckley and his wife, Marjory Hinckley came to speak to us at a huge conference in Alaska. I can vividly remember every detail – from the hundreds of people driving from all over the state and sleeping in the members’ in Anchorage’s homes, to the huge building we all gathered in to hear the Lord’s messenger speak.

I can remember sitting there in the huge congregation, higher up in the level seating. Afterwards as we were exiting, I shook the Prophet’s hand.  And his wife, one of the most amazing women of all time, told me that she’d been watching me, and I was one of the best behaved little girls she’d ever seen. Out of all the hundreds (or even thousands) of little girls there, she noticed me. I wasn’t even sitting close to the stage.

The other thing that I remember from that conference is what my father told me President Hinckley said in the adult session of the conference. I’m not sure why of all the things growing up, this one comment my father told me has never left me, but it hasn't.

President Hinckley told the group that in the last days, one of the biggest issues in the LDS church would be women demanding the priesthood.

He said that almost 20 years ago.

 And here I am, 20 years later, with friends wearing pants to church to make a statement about “equality”.

God made us different. He made our roles different.

I can’t wait to be a mother – Trevor is an amazing priesthood holder.

I don’t want the priesthood and he doesn’t want to have a baby. But I get to sustain and support Trevor as he uses his priesthood righteously, and he gets to be the father of the children I bare. Together, we have the whole package and the power to create life, to be an eternal family. Apart – neither of our gifts can fulfill their true potential.

Love,

 Brittney"

And here is a video I came across by our beloved Sheri Dew entitled "What do LDS women get?"

Magnets and everybody else!

Eight months ago, I gave birth to the sweetest and happiest little boy the world has ever known. If you don't believe me, ask anyone who knows him. Nobody I know has ever seen a happier or more pleasant baby and I am truly grateful for his personality. I love the way he smiles to everyone, the way he laughs and looks around as if he just can't take the world in fast enough. I love being home with him, teaching him, loving him and I would not give that up for anything. Not only have I been blessed by the opportunity of caring for this little man, being home alone with him every day has brought out a side of me I have never known before and after months of thinking, contemplating, and experimenting I just NEED to write all my thoughts down.

            Lately, the topic of extroversion vs. introversion has been a hot topic. being someone who, I feel, has a baffling and deep personality I have followed this topic with great interest trying to figure out what I am. Well, I have reached the conclusion that I am neither.

                I always thought I was the introvert because although I am not shy, the idea of going to a party with dancing, loud music, and lots of people made me sick. After a lot of social interaction I really need to be alone with a good book or my thoughts. But on the other hand, being home the past 8 months with nobody to converse with has made my brain feel numb. Too much star trek than is good for me and a lack of structure makes me feel useless. Don't get me wrong, the raising my son part is very fulfilling but I am talking about the time when he is napping and I am on the couch reading, watching a show, or thinking. Being the "intrapersonal" person that I am, I quickly thought through everything I was feeling and made a plan for myself. I started making friends with my friends.

                Okay, I know what you're thinking; "She's crazy!" Well let me explain, I have lived in the same town for over 2 years and have made a lot of friends. Friends I really like, friends I would say hi to at church, friends I would invite over for an evening once every few months. In my need for more social interaction, I started calling these friends to run with me and when I say run I mean walk and talk of course. I have gone to their homes for half an hour just to visit. And I have made an effort to get to know them on a more personal level. This is something I have never done before. In the past two or three years I have become a confidant adult with a generally positive self image. I love my life, my husband and my son. I am happy. But getting here was a process of self discovery and learning. Of coming to love who I am and becoming comfortable with myself. It was not until I gave up the pretense of who I thought I needed to be and embraced who I WANTED to be that I was truly happy.

                 All my realizations and experiments to figure out what I need (God, family, friends and structure) and how to get them were great because now I am a satisfied young adult who finds joy in living, hard work, and improving myself (which let me tell you is a daily struggle, what? the sink is full of dishes AGAIN?) are great but then my teenage sister came to stay with me and I realized something more about myself. I was never as adjusted as I thought. I got through middle school and subsequent years with ups and downs, I had sad days and days when I felt lonely and like I didn't have friends. (Friends meaning a lot of friends because I did have a few who never left me doubting!!) Looking back I remember those days. I remember being very sad at times, they would pass and things got better because someone had a girls night and I got invited but the issue was still there lurking under the surface. I felt inadequate. I felt like I didn't have friends, even though people liked me. I was the person everybody liked, but nobody remembered to invite. I was the main characters best friend because in the world of adolescence there is a queen bee (magnet) and her followers but little room for both feeling accepted and having individuality. (obviously a generalization, but i think accurate for many young people).

                So I thought about this new issue, this issue of teenage girls (and possibly boys but I won't even pretend to understand them) feeling alone, feeling like they can't walk into a room and be who they are without judgment being passed. It's sad and I thought, who cares if they are an introvert or an extrovert. WHO CARES?? It doesn't matter which personality type you fit into most, however, it does matter that you are happy with who and what you are. That you can feel important and worthwhile no matter where in the social structure you fit. It also matters that you can let others do the same without the need to judge them. So I came up with two types of people and I hope you'll agree they are more important to discuss than your personality type.

                There are the magnets and then there is everybody else. The magnets make up the smallest group of people each magnet is different from another. Everybody else is the majority of people and they too come in all shapes and sizes.

                If you went outside for recess, lunch break anything like that and didn't want to choose a spot because you knew when everyone else came out you would probably be left alone or have to get up and move to where they all flocked, your everybody else. If you have friends but are never the center of attention, your everybody else. But say your that person who can arrive last, pick an empty shady spot under a tree and suddenly be surrounded by other people, you're a magnet. If you go to a party, everyone else will also, you're a magnet. This isn't to say magnets necessarily WANT to be a magnet or thrive on being such, only that they are. They attract people to them and people want to be their friend. They don't seem to even have to try.

                I am not a magnet and neither is my little sister who spurred all this thought in the first place. My sister is well liked, she is gorgeous, she has the most hilarious personality, she is smart, and she is fun but she is not a magnet. It took me 24 years to put a name to what I am not and be okay with it. I am not a magnet, and that's okay. I believe a lot of people think that just because others don't flock to them or always think of them first that they are not really liked when in fact, MOST of us don't have a following and those who do, may still have those same feeling. There are few magnets in the world yet all us other folk see them and think "I must not be liked because I am not a magnet" and we would be wrong. You can be "everybody else" and still be liked and accepted. In fact, the more I think about it the more I am glad that I am NOT a magnet. I am sure it comes with its own down sides one of which being that you can't find a quiet shady spot to sit alone because you are never left alone. I wish I could help everybody else come to realize their own merits. Come to understand that they are beautiful, talented, worthwhile daughters and sons of God and learn to join in and make friends. Call someone to come over because you like them and want to be friends. Most of us won't be able to sit in our rooms with our phones constantly buzzing with invitations, funny stories, and friendly messages, most of us are not magnets.

Friends

 

Siblings= friendsX1,000,000

                I don't have to be friendless simply because I am not a magnet. Somebody has to make the effort and if having friends is worth it, you might just have to be the one to start it. True friendships, just like any relationship, take work but YOU are in control. I wrote this in the hope that someone can be inspired to take control of their own happiness instead of waiting to turn into a magnets. Think about when you are happiest and then create those situations. Be comfortable with yourself and choose friends who allow you to be just you. Instead of worrying so much about whether you are an introvert or extrovert or how to handle the other, just be friendly and kind to everyone. Encourage friendships with those you enjoy being with and be comfortable with yourself. This is the future confidence I want for my sister and my son.

Family Zoo Day

We FINALLY made it to the San Diego Zoo. SO WORTH THE DRIVE! Brandon's favorite are reptiles and insects, mine are the tigers and rhinos. Seth's favorite were the statues and sitting on things... go figure!!

This photo is my all time favorite!!

Family and Weddings

August has been a pretty crazy month, one that is best told in pictures. I hope you enjoy!

First off Seth flew

He got to spend time with his aunts, uncles, and Grandparents!

We took family pictures

And we went to Becca's wedding

Seth and Seth

 I decided to completely let go and the result was that Seth got to try a lot of new things, including ice cream. Now that Seth is so mobile and crawling, rolling, and scooting all over the place we discovered that he is allergic to nylon (at least that what we think the rash on his legs, arms, and cheeks is from. The carpet where we stayed was nylon and his arms always look sun burnt even though he wears a long sleeved rash guard, yes its made of nylon!)